Anger management in children

Anger in children

Anger in children is a way to express their feelings and interact with the world around them. But, what exactly is anger in children? How can anger management  be a good tool for parents and educators to understand it better?

Anger in children is not just a type of behavior, but rather a language that expresses their emotional needs and desires. It is a common emotional experience that can include feelings of anger, frustration, and being provoked.

Feelings of anger in children come in a variety of forms, whether through violent behavior, such as loud crying or screaming, or through negative behavior, such as isolation and lack of social interaction. Understanding these emotional experiences for children is an important part of their parenting, as they learn over time how to manage and express their feelings in healthy and effective ways.

Causes of anger in children

Senior clinical psychologist and Director of Academic Psycho-Learning Services for Children and Adults in Delhi, Deepali Batra, as reported on Al Jazeera.net, points out that the causes of anger in children include:

1. Genetic factors.

2. Underlying psychological conditions, such as ADHD and anxiety.

3. Exposure to violence by parents towards the child or others.

4. Bullying and problems adjusting to peers.

5. Poor sleep schedule.

6. Exposure to violent video games.

7. Exposure to trauma or exposure to various forms of abuse, whether physical, emotional, or sexual.

How do I teach my child anger management?

1- Ask your child to go to his room to take a break until he calms down

2- Teach your child the vocabulary for self-expression so that he can express himself through words instead of screaming or resorting to violence, for example, I am angry, afraid, this bothers me…

3- The child calms down when he sees that someone is listening to his anger, so encourage him to express his feelings and talk about what makes him angry.

4- Establish controls on your child’s anger. Tell him that it is not permissible to utter inappropriate words, scream, or resort to violence, but the discussion is open to express his feelings.

5- If you are one of the parents who scream or do any bad behavior when they are angry, you must change your behavior so that your child can take you as an example when he is angry. 

6- Discover new ways to release anger in children, such as physical activity, drawing, or any hobby that will release negative energy during their day.

7- Hug your child in the event of a tantrum, which makes him feel comfortable and reduces his feelings of anger and nervousness.

8- Try to identify the things that make your child angry, avoid them, and try to handle the situation.

You can also check Understanding anxiety disorder in children: causes and treatment

How to control children’s anger?

An American educational expert and consultant recommended three methods and strategies for anger management and to reduce the aggressive behavior they may display, which increases their ability to control their feelings and interact properly with situations.

In an article published by Dr. Jeffrey Bernstein, an American expert specializing in raising children, on the “Psychology Today” website, he emphasized that there are three effective strategies that parents can adopt to improve their children’s behavior.

First strategy:

Bernstein suggests teaching children emotional regulation techniques, by encouraging them to replace negative thoughts with more compassionate and resilient ones. It also stresses the importance of motivating the child to express his feelings constructively and change negative beliefs into more beneficial ones.

Second strategy:

This strategy focuses on promoting open communication and active listening, as it is recommended to provide an environment that allows the child to express his feelings freely without fear of judgment or punishment. Emphasizes teaching children that anger is normal, but must be expressed appropriately.

Third strategy:

By teaching problem-solving and conflict-managment skills. Bernstein points out the need to help the child identify the triggers that make him angry and teach him how to better predict his reactions. He also recommends encouraging children to exchange ideas and seek solutions to problems positively.

Bernstein concludes by emphasizing the importance of consistency, patience, and support in helping children manage their anger effectively. If there is continued concern about a child’s anger or escalation of harmful behavior, it is advisable to seek guidance from a qualified professional, such as a child psychiatrist.